Friday, August 3, 2012

My first "goodbye"

I could have straightened out this picture, but I didn't want to- it matches the way our vacation went.

In short. This vacation was probably one of my very most favorite. Nothing went according to plan in fact my brothers said that we were experiencing Lake Powell "by fire". Everything that could have gone wrong did including trailer wheels breaking, storms, running out of gas, swimming boats to docks and a dog peeing on Lindsey's purse and little Bentlee's Elmo. But because of all of these trials we had to work together, we were able to be a family- I loved it. Every minute of it. 

And this afternoon I had to say goodbye.

Bryan, Natalie, Niah, Chloe and Mr. Bennett headed back this afternoon and I had to say goodbye. I won't see them again before I leave. Oh, the kids will be so old by then and the little man on the way I won't know until he can walk and talk like a big boy.

Going on a mission became more real to me these last few days. Maybe with time it is just sinking in or maybe I realized that I won't be able to just come see this wonderful family of mine whenever I want. Maybe it was holding sleeping children on my lap every boat ride and braiding my nieces' hair. Maybe it was the way Grandma races me to say "Love you infinite" first or the way Dad squeezes my shoulder when he passes by me. Or maybe it was when I realized that Mom and I have the same laugh or the fresh sun burn that my skin sometimes craves. 

My family is amazing. I am not going to flower it up. It is what it is. And this "it" or my family is the bomb. I know I will miss them- all of them- while I am gone. But then I think of the missionary quote that is all the wall with all the plaques of my brothers from their missions that says: 

"A missionary is someone who leaves his family for a short time, 
so that others may be with their family for eternity."

And the love I have for my family radiates inside of me.
I want others to have that.
I want to share the joy, happiness and peace in knowing that I can be with my family forever.

My name is Kelsie and I am a soon-to-be missionary.